The Mostly Hetero Adventures with the Two-Spirit Kid

So far:

Day 1: Tuesday: My suitcase that I did not want to check, but had to because of the tiny ass plane, was left in Atlanta as the flight attendant said it would be transferred to my next plane.

After arranging to have my suitcase sent to Durango, Dan and I left Phoenix and took the old highways to Payson, where Fire in the Sky happened. Then we went through Snow Flake and um.... I forgot. Then we went up to Holbrook and I saw the dinosaur on the cover of my book, Roadside America, and it was awesome. There was a family of dinosaurs and dinosaurs eating dinosaurs.

Then we took that dreadful patch of I-40 to US-191 into the Navajo Rez (reservation) and saw what was probably a drunk, sort of ambling and meandering in what is almost to which Dan said, "Come on. Don't be a typical Reservation drunk." A little later we saw a dead dog on the side of the road to which I said, "Come on. Don't be a typical Rez dog."

We arrived at Canyon de Chelley around 7:00 and bought some food. At the Basha's supermarket I felt like a minority for only the third time in my life. It's somewhat disconcerting at first. Such is white privilege. There were many mutts roaming the parking lot.

I wanted some hot food that wasn't fast food, but it seems there are no restaurants there, so I had Burger King. Of course it was getting dark and the free campground was closed, so we drove into the growing darkness to what the sign referred to as Spider Rock campsite. On the sides of the roads were loose horses, many adults with babies.

We set up a fire and warmed ourselves. We had no tent so we set up blankets and what not in the back of Dan's Saturn View. We didn't have much firewood, so we bought some from the campsite owner, Harold. Then we made a nice fire and toasted some of the giant ass marshmallows we'd bought.

We went to sleep and some time later I awoke with the sweatiest of balls.

I have no idea what time it was, but it was dark and windy as fuck when I could no longer sleep through the diahrea pangs. In the ladies outhouse I had to let it rip while the cold winds ripped into me. It finally ended and I walked back to the car in the slight moonlight and got settled back in after waking Dan. Then the pangs began anew. This time I realized the men's outhouse was just on the other side.

At some point it began to rain. I did not sleep well.

Day 2: I reluctantly awoke a bunch more times and Dan stayed away at around 5:30 and walked some trailed while I attempted more sleep. We finally left the site at around 7:00 am and checked out some scenic overlooks before heading to the Four Corners.

The Four Corners costs $3.00 per person. It's not all that impressive, but since Tyrel and I never made it four years ago, I had to go for that symbolism and the fake four corners symbolism, as apparently the true four corners is elsewhere. I bought some fresh fry bread with honey from a cute old lady. I took two loperamide (anti-spasmodic) after my previous night's horror.

Then we drove on to Durango, about two hours away. Most of this part of southern Colorado is so lush. Since I'd heard nothing regarding my suitcase, we hung in Durango for a while at the Durango Coffee Company so Dan could do some homework or work. Fucking responsibilities.

Once he was done we walked down Main Ave. and found a sweet foot path along the Anima River. It was really beautiful and it sucked that I had no charged batteries because my car adapter was in my AWOL suitcase.

I checked out the fares on the narrow gage railroad, but it's expensive and an all day affair. We ended up eating at this funky taqueria. The tacos were decent.

Durango seems a lot nicer than Flagstaff, with huge green mountains on all sides and an awesome river with rafting trips. Perhaps we'll get a chance to do that on the way back through after the Great Sand Dunes and Gunnison, and perhaps Black Canyon National Park. But Durango is still small, probably gets a shit ton of snow, but might be nice to live in one of the river overlook apartments that probably cost an arm and a leg, and I'd only want to try it for six months. Colorado is so much better than Arizona.

Anyhow, about that time it was pouring ass rain and six, so if my suitcase didn't make it on the noon flight (which it probably did), it would be there in the six o'clock flight. And so it was. By time we arrived at the tiny airport the rain had ceased, but once we'd gotten back on US-160 it began raining like a mothafuck again, off and on.

The speed is normally 65, which is fine, but not when there's a deluge. When twilight began we came upon the impressive and snow-capped Rockies. It's a beautiful sight: clouds passing between mountain peaks, green trees everywhere, a river to the left. At this point it was not raining, so I pulled over and Dan took some photos. I don't know if they can capture the majesty.

Then we realized we'd have to drive into those snowy mountains.

Up we climbed at 30 miles per hour, slowly, slowly, crawling, the temperature dropping until it hit the mid-thirties. We finally crested in the darkness, snow and ice on the ground, water gushing from the mountain tops. Yeah.

The next signs said 8% downgrade and so I decided I needed to piss before committing to the downhill onslaught to the Death Proof soundtrack.

More to come regarding this night soon...

Where have all the hookers gone? - Jerome, Arizona

THIS ENTRY IS UNDER CONSTRUCTION

When in Jerome, visit the Haunted Hamburger and be sure to get your ten inch fill of chocolately goodness.

TEN INCHES of chocolately goodness and I ate my slice all on my own, icing and all.
Don't ever let someone tell you you can't do something, because then you'll have to prove the bastards wrong--Cool Hand Luke style.
(Photo by Kristin.)

Visit the House on Haunted Hill.








Photo by Kristin.

The Jerome Grand Hotel

Once a mental asylum, it is now a swanky hotel with a retauraunt called the Asylum.

Up a hill from the hotal is a collapsed building.

























Downtown Jerome from the park. To the left is the alley where hookers roamed.

Kristin and I enjoy the swings
on a warm day.

Photo by Scott.

If Ghost Rider were real...
this might be his bike.

Many bikers enjoy Jerome.

HOUSE OF JOY

House of Joy: Contains so many cool things. They have original and facsimile ephemera and apparel from the 1920's an on.



One can find old matchbooks, hair jelly tins, postcards, photos, pins, buttons and so on, items from WWII, the USSR, communist China.
House of Joy also has vintage swiss army goggles in tins, sexy little outfits for your sexy little number. Masks, pasties, fishnets.

Sadly no photography is allowed inside.

Welcome to Valkenvania
presided over by Shire Reeve:
Judge Alvin Valkenheiser
The Old Mining Town

For a mere $4.00 admission price one can see the glory of yesteryear, of American capitolism and what it's left behind in the desert.





Phtoto by Kristin.

Old rusted trucks, cars and vans line roadways.

Photo by Kristin.

"Does it hurt?": Probably a turn of the century dentists' office.



Photo by Kristin.

Phtoto by Kristin.

Phtoto by Kristin.

Photo by Kristin.

Photo by Kristin.

Get out the way
Old Scott Tucker
You're too late
To get your supper!

Photo by Kristin.

Four teenagers
left for a concert...
None returned.

The donkey rings a bell, demanding to be fed. Scott looks at the creature increduously, as if telling it to go screw itself.

Photo by Kristin.

Guy Montag
races to the
secret library...
the hound follows.

Fighting fire
with fire
since 1981.






Photo by Kristin.

This looks like Forager's
head covering from
Jack Kirby's
New Gods.








Photo by Kristin.

You've made a grave
mistake coming here...








Photo by Kristin.

Here lies Ballin,
son of Fundin...

The family that
spelunks together...

Photo by Kristin.

Beware what creatures
lurk in the dark shadows
of old mines...









Photo by Kristin.

Looks like someone
robbed the bank...
of their floor!
Haw!


Photo by Kristin.

If you're not gonna be careful, we ain't gonna hire ya.

Photo by Kristin.

An old Shell truck.



Photo by Kristin.

Geeks Unite! - Phoenix Comicon - Sunday 28 January 2007

Go Ghostbusters!

The Dark Knight returned! Spider-Man swung into town and Wolverine clawed his way through the crowds to be there too. Bounty hunter Spike Spiegel was puffin' on a cig and the crew from Naruto were ready to fight at a moment's notice.

The Phoenix Comicon, held at the Mesa Convention Center, just outside of Phoenix proper, is a fun event. It's small compared to most New York shows, but it was about what I expected for the area and it was pretty frickin' cool anyhow. I got in for free, so I can't complain. My friend, Tyrel from Sierra Vista, AKA "T," met me there. I spent all my spare cash on half off trades and graphic novels (Batman, UK Transformers, etc.) as well as Howard the Duck comics. I bought some HTD at Bookman's last week and they are really funny. Yes, the movie is something of an abomination in most people's eyes (though whatsherface is in it), but the comics that inspired the movie are nothing short of slapstick awesomeness. No number one though. Perhaps next time or on eBay.


As with any good comic show, there was a variety of vendors to satisfy most wants and even what some consider "needs." Atomic Comics (left) had pulled the van in with many current comics and trade paperbacks. There was a guy with half off trades (more, please). There were even more dealers with current, hot comics (Civil War galore), guys with dollar comics from the mid-seventies to today. I think there was even my usual favorite, a fifty-cent guy. There were a few Manga dealers as well as guys carrying tons of little and not so little import toys from Japan and the like. There were some toy dealers with some cool action figures.


I also got a free adult comic at Carnal Comics from the dollar box. I was stoked. I can't wait to read Modern Romans. It must be historical. They didn't have any Small Favors trades, which I remember is self-proclaimed "girly porn" on the cover blurb. It's a really funny book.

Deadpool (left) make a hit on some fat bounty head in the parking lot.

Who wants to be a superhero?
This guy!

Here's web in your face!






George Perez, Arthur Suydam, Mike Mignola (left), Brian Pulido and other popular comic creators were there. Steve Rude (Nexus) had been there sometime over the weekend.










There were many local creators, novelist Mike Stackpole (right) being one of them. He's written some great Star Wars: X-Wing novels about the liberation of Coruscant following the deaths of Vader and the Emperor. I spoke with him for a few minutes and plan on getting his book of short stories, poems and what not, sometime soon.


There is also this company that makes kick-ass sturdy lightsabers that you can actually fight with and that supposedly won't break. They don't make noise, but the fact that they light up as they do and hopefully won't break like the Hasbro ones is awesome. I am getting one when I have some money. I can't wait to fight in all sorts of environments, like the sand dunes, the snow, and Bespin carbon freeze chamber. I think I'll get a red one and a blue one. Maybe a green one too. There go two paychecks and then some.





















"Bell peppers and beef? But there's no beef!"

- Spike Speigel on bell peppers
and beef.

I stopped at Bookman's in what I think was Mesa, possibly near ASU. It's a lot bigger than the one in Flag and it's got a whole bookshelf full of trades and graphic novels, as opposed to half a row on a shelf. They were about to close when I arrived, so I didn't have much time to look around. I bet their selection is sweet.